Winter

(my sentiments exactly)

Winter.

I'm feeling the weight of it today. 

the cold
the murky inversion
the sharp air in my ears and on my face
the snow
the icy roads
the cold
the cold
the cold
did I mention the cold??

I miss going up the canyon every afternoon to spend time with the trees and the rocks and the little rivers.  I miss the sound of the birds singing their songs.  I miss the crickets.  I miss the sun.  I miss the warm breezes blowing through the leaves.  I miss color.  Everything is so gray, gray, gray.  Blech.  And then there is all of the commercialism associated with Christmas.  All of the obligatory gift giving.  All of the expectations from family and friends about where you will be and what you will do and how you will act.  Ew.

I want to be done with all of it.  I want to buy a plane ticket to Sunnyside Anywhere and stay there until April.

But perhaps I'm just being restless.  Winter is, if nothing else, a wonderful reminder that there are seasons.  There are times and seasons to everything.  EVERYTHING.  I see, in the seasons and the weather, a reflection of my own inner seasons.  I, too, shift and change and go through seasons.  This is a continual theme for me.  Perspective, perspective, perspective.  (Feeling warm and fuzzy yet??)

But it's still cold as hell. 
It just is. 
And I don't have to like it. 

I can have all the perspective in the world and still hate the cold.  So today, I'm going to give myself a pick-me-up.  I'm going to go to my local thrift shop and purchase a new hat, or a superhero cape, or a pair of grandma glasses.  Maybe some bright orange shoes?  Perhaps something with glitter or sequins??  Who knows what kind of treasure I will dig up?  Whatever it turns out to be, I am going to wear it as a reminder that even though everything around me is gray and dead and gray and gray, I am not.

No.

I am very much alive.