Excuse Me

Why should I require abs?

I want a man with a soft stomach so that when I rest my head on it, I can feel comfortable.

Why should I require a flat stomach?

I want a man who will go on ice cream, frozen yogurt, and dinner dates with me.

Why should I require someone hot in bed?

I want a man who knows the skills to satisfy me in bed. And physical attractiveness is no guarantee of that.

Why should I require clear skin, blemish free?

I want a blemish or a few to remind me that no one is ever perfect, ever. And that his scars make him better, not bitter, about the way his life has gone.

Why should I require a full head of hair?

I want a head that can understand my rants about gender, heteronormativity, and queer theory. And give me feedback.

Why should I require a man to be masculine?

I want a man who is unafraid of being who he truly is, even if it contrasts with what the world wants from him.

Why should I require someone like me?

I want a man who expects these same sentiments from me.

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Thank you for letting me indulge in some creative writing. I’ve been getting pretty fed up with societal expectations of people, and moreover, people’s adhesion to these ideas. Society isn’t an individual; it isn’t one personal being that you will ever interact with. And its production of beauty standards and other expectations, dispensed through the media and culture, does not account for the majority of people in this country. While I enjoy the occasional depiction of a “Ken doll,” we must meet these images and the expectations that accompany them and that govern the rest of us with a critical eye. Will they truly bring us happiness in our individual lives? Should we police others by these standards?

Praise the Lord for hip ‘90s music. Because I’m not going to be a pawn in society’s game. And for that I respectfully say, “excuse me.”