Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Just Relax

Have you ever wondered what life would have been like if you had a supportive family concerning being gay? In all the hype and drama on the media about being gay, I think most people forget about some of the little things that matter in parents not supporting their gay children.

Have you ever gone on an amazing date with that special girl or boy and just wanted your parents to call (or you call them) to ask how it went and what you thought and what you two did? Have you ever wished you could be able to have a long drive with your father or mother and tell them about a person you like and how you're not sure to react or what to do and then listen to them give advice and relate their own experiences from when they dated?

I have also pondered what it would have been like to have family that treated their gay children as one of their own. The brother that stands up for their gay sibling when they're being picked on. One of the most painful things I ever and still experience is the shallow nature of my relationship with my family. Conversations are forced at times and avoid the heart of normal healthy conversations. I think, however embarrassing, that asking such questions about the person you are dating or someone you're interested in are important and questions that help lead to a closer relationship.

I have been very fortunate that I have another family in my life that are not bound to me legally or biologically. The parents and child in that family have just been great friends that see me as their son. They ask those questions. They want to see me be happy. They don't care who I marry or like so long as I treat them well and that person treats me well.

And let's be honest here for a moment. All this hating of gays, "love the sinner, hate the sin," and actually being grossed out by expression of love between two people of the same gender is juvenile. I think the last time I thought two people kissing was gross was when I was in the third or fourth grade. Seriously, why freak out? Should I organize a posse of gays to gather around straight couples when they kiss and boo them down? That would be ludicrous! Love is beautiful in all its forms! If I could ask bigots and homophobes one question it would probably be this, "Don't you ever get tired having to hate people?" Oh all right, I'd probably ask, "Don't you hate being wrong so often?"

So, I say to families with gay children, get to know them. Don't get all held up by the gender of their lover. Don't even worry about when they kiss. It's really sweet to watch to people in love kiss. Worry about them being happy and what's going on in their life. Worry about the more important things than the gender of the person. We have more important things to worry about in this life than that. Why not worry about whether the people in your city are eating enough? Why not worry about people suffering from depression or feeling alone?

Love those gay kids. Hug a lesbian! Hug a gay! Group hug/tackle a transgender person. Listen to a bisexual person talk about their life. Honestly, it's better than judging. Soooooo much better. Have a great week, everyone!

1 comment:

  1. What a great post. HUG A LESBIAN!!!! :)

    Jeremy, I have wished for those things and honestly have had those things with my mom. I've asked her to write a post, and hopefully she will. I know it's hard for her to see some of my life changes, but she does treat me the same. And I know she likes to hear about the girls I'm interested in.

    Thanks for the great post. And the good advice. I will try to stop freaking out when I see two heterosexuals kiss...