Sunday, March 11, 2012

30 Minute Orgasm

Okay, I hope you're ready for some silence slaying. Because this topic, while largely overdone in some areas, is actually not talked about in serious, educational ways. I doubt I will be able to give you that....because I'm not serious...but maybe it'll at least be a little educational?

Addie and I have been all over each other the past couple days. Maybe that's TMI, but we all know it happens, so let's just get it out there. Addie is very sexy.

I have two stories for you. And I hope you learn something from both.

First, shower sex is really really fun. However, if you stand too long in a hot shower making hott love after already being a little dehydrated, there is a very high possibility of blacking out. I may have locked my knees or something as well, but that part I don't remember. I didn't actually black out completely--like falling over and being unconscious and waking up. I felt a little light-headed at first. Then it just kept getting worse. I told Addie I wanted some water. Then my vision kind of know the way drunks slur their speech...then it just went black. I'm assuming this is the point where my face turned pale and my eyes dilated so big there was hardly any brown left (I feel really bad for Addie because this must have been crazy scary to see). The blackness only lasted a few seconds or so...I don't really know how long it was. I blinked like crazy trying to see, and it came back little bits at a time, but I saw all these weird patterns and it looked like those weird "negative" style pictures you can make in the photo booth computer program. Addie held on to me, until I felt okay enough to step out of the shower then she had me lie down. That has never happened to me before. Ever. But, after researching things about blacking out or passing out or fainting (there are a lot of terms for it), I found that dilating pupils and pale skin are signs (for others to see) of it coming on, and symptoms (for you to notice in yourself) are blurred vision, light-headedness, feeling heavy, etc. The best thing to do is put your head between your knees or to lie down with your feet up because  what's happening is your brain isn't getting enough blood flow. I also read that people pass out from defecating...really people?? If you're passing out from taking a shit that's a sure sign you need more fiber in your diet.

Second, I found out this weekend that all the hype about how women are capable of multiple orgasms in a row is very true. Addie and I laughed the whole time, but to be honest it was almost alarming to see how wet our bed got from all our fun.

So, for you virgins out there (which technically includes me because I've never had sex with a man...) here's a little sex 101. Keep in mind I can only tell you about lesbian sex, but for the straight men and women this might also be somewhat helpful because it's a woman thing.

Lesson 1: When men reach orgasm/climax/whatever it is, they ejaculate semen. This is what makes the babies when a lady-vagina is on the receiving end of the ejaculation. Most of you probably already know this.

Note: straight ladies, you cannot get pregnant from a guy ejaculating into your mouth or anywhere else on you...pretty sure it only happens when it's in the vag.

Another Note: gay guys, you don't have to worry about getting pregnant...because you don't have vaginas. :)

Last Note: lesbian ladies, you cannot get pregnant from your girlfriends (but you still can get pregnant if you have sex with dudes...just saying, you're still a girl with a vagina).

Lesson 2: When women reach orgasm/climax/whatever it is, they ejaculate what Addie and I like to call  "organic fuck juice" also known as cum (this is also what manly ejaculation is called...I think). This substance comes through the urethra (that's where the pee comes out, in case you don't know biology/anatomy), which has made lot of people in the past believe that it's urine, so they think it's gross. However, it is, in fact, more like semen (just without the sperm) and generally is clear or milky with almost no smell, and sometimes a sweet taste. mmm :)

Note: for the ladies, when you're cumming, it can feel almost like you're peeing...but you'll know the difference. My advice is not to be scared of it. let it come. cum. :)

Another Note: for those playing around with the ladies (be you man or woman), it's important for you to understand that cum/ejaculation is a really fun part of the lady orgasm, and if you can get your lady to cum, then you're damn good at fucking so take pride in that organic fucking juice you helped produce.

Last Note: sex is still fun without the organic fucking juice...really it is. And don't feel like a failure if your partner doesn't cum. However, if you're curious and want to see if you can do it, then experiment a little with things you've never tried. I don't want to make this a sex forum or anything, but there are lots of different things you can do. If you want some ideas then just ask me. If you'd like to keep it personal (and fairly anonymous since I don't think I know any of you) you can email me (

RyBread Wisdom:
If you or your sex buddy is anything like me then you might want to lay down some towels before things get wet. This is about taking precautions when venturing into sexual fun times. You'll all have remembered to use condoms or the pill or dental dams or whatever it is you need in that regard. But, if you're gonna want to sleep in the bed that you have sex in, you'll want to take necessary measures to keep it dry (unless you like wet and cold). There are a few options for this, but first it might be important to just get to know your body (and your partner's). If you find that you ejaculate like crazy and get everything wet then you'll want to find what works for you and your partner. Some ladies take care of business in the bathroom before going to play with their men (personally, I think this is because some men suck and don't understand the beauty of female ejaculation). Some ladies also will control their cum and let it out later when play time is over (again...not my favorite option).

In the past I've made a decent sized puddle and then just put a towel over it to sleep on. After this weekends adventures we had to tear all the sheets off the bed, put a towel down, re-sheet the bed, put another towel down. This my friend is from what I call the 30 minute orgasm. It just wouldn't stop. And, I don't know how my body can produce so much fucking juice, but it did, and it felt amazing.

So, put a few towels down if you need to. Maybe several, if you think things might get to the 30 minute stage. :)


  1. This is a lovely post, and oh so educational. I love your frankness. Personally, I've never had a problem with bodily juices, but I've heard that many people are disgusted by it. What the hell?? You can play around but you just can't handle the outcome (outcum??)?

    Anyway, great post. :)

    1. HAHAAHA. outcum... :) Yeah, I don't get it either. But, you're talking to a girl that loves eating out and loves to swallow all organic juices (at least the ones Addie makes). ;)

    2. Bahahahahaha - ladies, I LOVE you both! So funny.

  2. I've said it before and I mean it even more tonight. I need more lesbian in my life! This made me blush but also answered a LOT of questions! Anyway, always good to be prepared, right? Towels are important but the list is actually much longer... At least for guys. Just sayin' - ha!

    1. Also, 30 minutes? I don't know if I should be jealous but I am. But, then again, I don't know if I could handle it... I'd sure like to try!

    2. HA. I'm glad it answered a lot of your questions, MJ. Let me know if you have any more.

      I have to say you've piqued my interest...Are you talking about a longer list for gay guys or just for guys in general? I have no experience or ideas regarding either of them.

      As for the 30 was kinda more like a continuous series of orgasm after orgasm...And it lasted a looong time. Every new ejaculation had me and Addie laughing our heads off. Are guys even capable of something like that? I've heard they really can only do one and then it's rest time then when they get worked up again they can do another...

      HAHA this just reminded me of this little demonstration we do at Arby''s kind of like an initiatory thing for the newbies. My manager showed me and I've carried on the tradition of showing all the new teenagers that come in for their summer/after-school jobs. It's basically a sex lesson, but with no explanation at all except: "This is what sex looks like." We take a clear, curved lid from the popcorn chicken containers and a little coffee creamer. Hold them over the trash can and squeeze the creamer till it pops and splatters the lid.

    3. Oh my hell your sex ed demonstration sounds like a lot of fun! List for guys? Towel(s), condom(s), lube, yoga/pilates videos, and preferably some form of ventilation (guys are pretty musky) - are all pretty essential. This list is primarily for gay guys but there's a lot of overlap.

      Anyway, MOST men cannot have multiple orgasms but I know that a very select few can. We generally need a break between sessions. But, when you are with someone you are really into, the time between can be severely shortened.

      Ha ha, you have my e-mail, too. If you have more questions, don't hesitate to ask.

    4. Yoga/pilates videos??? What??

    5. One must be flexible. Just sayin'...

    6. Haha first time I've heard of the Yoga/Pilates videos. :D But I guess that makes sense. Great post! :D

    7. Well, MJ, if that's all you've got on your list of sex things (I had assumed you meant precautionary/cleanliness sort of a list, which I'd still be interested in hearing about...) then we can go on and on about things that you can include in lady sex.

      Men need condoms. Ladies need dental dams (or condoms depending on parter/toys).
      Men need lube. Ladies need lube too (some of them, but probably not in the way that gay men do).
      Women are more flexible than men generally speaking, but some pilates videos could certainly make things interesting... :)
      There are all kinds of things you can add to make sex different. But, all you really need are two sexy ladies who like each other (and clean hands).

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    10. Wow. that may have been too many details, even for me. I feel like ALL the questions I never thought to ask were certainly answered here.

      some women need lube because they don't secrete enough fluids of their own to keep things smooth...some like to play the anal game, which I can imagine (although not experienced with it personally) requires significant amounts of lube.

    11. Well, I probably should have sent you that information directly. Maybe I slayed too much silence... I'm sorry if my response was too informative. o_O

  3. Holy POTATOES....I'm not even sure what to say. Of course, I've read all about the lady orgasm...I can never really figure out what it actually is. Does orgasm mean ejaculating? But, I will say this post was certainly very educational.

    The black-out thing sounds pretty scary. I've never blacked out...except maybe this one time in the fourth grade while singing christmas songs with a little group before school...I don't really remember anything except feeling light-headed and then later my mom came and took me to go get my blood tested. That was also the day the flabotamist couldn't find my vein and I have terrible feelings about my blood being drawn.

  4. I applaud your ability to speak of this kind of experience, but I don't think this was the place to make this kind of post. I understand that we're trying to break the silence, but there is also a particular vein of language, tone, consistency, and level of depth that this blog has gone into about these topics. I have absolutely nothing against a story about you having sex with your girlfriend, but the problem is that this isn't a blog that has made such points about sex before, hetero or homo. I feel like if you made this post from the viewpoint of a guy screwing his girl, it would have been very derogatory and very cruel.

    I was about to tell my parents that I was writing for this blog, but this post is something I could not ever show them. It feels blunt and crude and exploitative of something that should be given more gentle treatment.

    I'm not the moderator of the group, but as a fellow blogger, I'd ask you to not use this shocking and exploiting language when addressing this subject again. I've talked with two different people about this post, and neither of them were straight TBM Mormons. One was an ex-Mormon lesbian, and the other was an ex-Mormon straight guy. They don't want to read this blog if this is the kind of language and treatment they're going to see.

    1. AKB, I truly appreciate your comments. And, perhaps I simply don't understand the exact purpose of the blog. Based on the title, the url, and the blog description, from my perspective I don't see how this post varies from those ideas. The url for the blog is LGBT Voices. The title is Breaking the Silence. And the description says "A group of
      LGBT bloggers share their ideas, opinions, and stories to help increase understanding about Lesbian/Gay/Bisexual/Transgender people and issues". Perhaps this can be taken a number of different ways, but I think generally it is a very open description. In this post I have shared my ideas, opinions, and stories to help increase understanding about lesbian people (me and my girlfriend, to be specific) and issues (sex). I deem it a form of "breaking the silence" because not many people address issues like this.

      However, I understand that those who read this blog are likely to fall into the same category as the rest of the bloggers (affiliated somehow with mormonism--please don't take that the wrong way, I just mean that it's something I'm not entirely familar with), and I may not have approached this in the right way for those readers. I'd like to know what your ideas are on a better way to approach such topics as sex (and fainting) so as to not cause problems or lose the intended audience.

    2. This is a hard subject that perhaps we got carried away with. That being said, our purpose with this blog is to literally break the silence surrounding issues that face the LGBTQ world. It looks like this is a discussion for our editorial board for further evaluation. Thanks to both of you for your valuable comments! :)

    3. i, for one, am a semi-mormon (kind of...) and loved this :) thanks!

  5. I feel like you should mention that not all women actually experience female ejaculation? I think that's an important note here.

    Almost all women DO self-lubricate. This means that a substance composed mostly of water but also some other bodily fluids will secrete from the walls of the vagina as well as periutheral glands (thank you Wikipedia for the technical term). This makes it more comfortable to have sex - anyone who has ever put in a tampon (or attempted to) knows that sticking things in your nether regions is not actually always pleasant. Self-lubrication allows for a more pleasurable experience. Some women don't self-lubricate as much as others and some medications (like anti-depressants) and life circumstances (like pregnancy) lead to vaginal dryness. That's why artificial lubricants are great. They can help make sex still fun instead of a chore in the event of vaginal dryness. Just make sure you use a water-based lube! Oil-based lubes can make condoms and dental damns ineffective.

    Female ejaculation is a large release of this secretion during orgasm. However, most females DON'T experience actual ejaculation. Unlike males, who experience an external release during orgasm, the release associated with female orgasm is internal (although still very very pleasurable). There IS a difference between just being a really good self-lubricator and female ejaculation.

    Also, while it's possible to self-lubricate/ejaculate through the urethra MOST self-lubrication occurs in the vaginal walls and in glands that surround and are at the base of the urethra (the ones at the base are what causes the confusion). More confusion ensues because for many women, an orgasm kind of does feel like needing to pee. (My recommendation is to pee before sex if possible!) But even one attempt at fooling around while a girl is wearing a tampon will show you that most self-lubrication comes from the vaginal walls themselves. (Also you should change your tampon after that...your body will thank you.)

    So yes, DEFINITELY put a towel down. You will thank yourself later. And washing a towel is way easier than washing your sheets.