Warning may trigger cutting!
There are different types of tattoos. Some silly from drunken nights. Others meaningful. Others in memory of someone else. Others to remind you. Lots of reasons. So today I want to tell you all of my tattoos.
The first one I got I was eighteen. It was the day before New Year’s Eve and I was out and about with a friend. Another friend was going to get her nose pierced and it was a tattoo parlor also. They were having a sale on tattoos, half off. It was totally impulsive. I went home and drew up a design for my grandmother who had passed two years earlier and got it that night around midnight. I was totally ripped off and I can’t say I enjoy how it turned out but we all learn from our mistakes. (Picture complete with ridiculously white back and lovely tan line. I got drivers arm on my way to Oregon.)
The next one I got was on Wednesday. I had been thinking I wanted a new one but I couldn't quite pin down exactly what I wanted. I figured I would go in and talk to a professional when the time was right. Well I was driving to the beach by myself and I passed a parlor, walked in, talked it through, decided and within the hour I was done. This one was twofold. First to remind me about my cousin’s Stephs suicide and second to remind me to be free. They go together because I need to remind myself I’m free to make my own decision so I don’t start thinking suicide is my only option again.
And then we have the more painful tattoos. The ones done at home. I used to cut myself. I still have the scars on my legs, even if they are fading. They were to focus my thoughts and remind me not to do something or other. Whenever I get stressed or overwhelmed I always want to cut to calm down. Lately I’ve been really good about it, but I know how hard it is.
So that’s what I got for today. We all have ways to remind us of our past, mine is tattoos, of all varieties.
This tattoo was also inspired by a song.
Blackbird- Beatles (Across The Universe Cover)