Friday, August 3, 2012

Change



I wrote a post for today. I even posted it. But then I deleted it.
Today I don’t want to whine about boys, I want to write about what I’ve been doing to change people’s (and my own) minds about the LGBT world.

So you guys might have read Lee’s post a few weeks ago. Basically a guy up here wrote about the whole Chick-Fil-A debacle. I went to the guy and told him that I was gay. He hugged me twice, apologized, and told me he loved me because I was a child of God. Since then we’ve actually become better friends and I’m able to show him that even though I am gay I’m not some crazy person.
Okay I might be a little crazy but the good kind.

Then today “I Kissed A Girl” by Katy Perry came on the dish room iPod. It was even a cover sung by a guy. But a friend of mine went and changed it. I asked him if he didn’t like the song. He told me it would be okay if a guy was singing it.
I went into deep pensive mode. My coworkers knew me well enough to know that something was up and to simply leave me alone. I thought a long time about what I could do.
Part of me thought of the ridiculousness of the situation. I mean we weren't allowed to listen to one song because a girl kisses a girl. In another Katy Perry songs she drinks, skips work, has promiscious sex, and a three-some but we're allowed to listen to that one. We even ignore the part where it cusses and just yell really loud. Dafuq? 
Part of me went to a dark place. A place that contemplated all the things I know I shouldn’t (did I mention I went off the Prozac. If I start to go crazy please kick my butt and tell me to go back on my meds. Anyways…). But then there was Ellen calling me back.  “Things will get easier, people's minds will change, and you should be alive to see it.” I kept that mantra in my head and thought of the ways I could create that change. To help people see that I am first a human and a Child of God. My orientation isn’t even who I am, it’s a part of me. So I’m working and the boy that made the comment and me are alone.

            Me: Hey I got to tell you something. I’m gay. Are you okay with that?
            Him: *A little taken aback* Yea of course.
            Me: You sure?
            Him: Of course. I have other friends that are gay.

And that was it. We went on working. Things didn’t change. He may hate “I Kissed A Girl” and thinks it’s wrong, but he still loves me.

I’m trying to change people’s mind. I am more than my orientation.

I have the ability to love everyone and I think that is awesome.
I hate killing things and will protect that poor little mice that my coworker was trying to catch.
I don’t like people using the words “gay” or “retarded” for things that aren’t gay or retarded.
I love trees and rain.
I like listening to music and it has the ability to affect my mood.
I fall in love easily.
I can scroll on Tumblr for way to long.
I miss my best friend with an ache that affects my daily behavior.
I really like skinny jeans and oversized male button down shirts.
I want to hike Timp.
I want to graduate from college and own a restaurant.
I am a spiritual human being that doesn’t feel the need to resign to a religion.

Those things are me. I am more than my orientation. I am more than just a member of the LGBT community. I know that I am a unique human being that has differing opinions than other people in that community. I am Dupree and hopefully people who love me (or even hate me) based on my actions and NOT my orientation. 

I love you guys. Things will constantly get better. People will change and we will change. We will grow and thrive. Not because we are gay, but because we are human beings who freaking deserve to be happy. 




9 comments:

  1. Dishroom? Where do you work? I worked in the kitchen/dishroom at the MTC one summer, and, coincidentally, that was where I first heard that "I Kissed a Girl Song." As I recall, it played through all the way; dozens of people were around hearing it, and I was probably the only one there who hadn't heard it previously. I guess that's the difference between the MTC and wherever you are ;).

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    1. I work at a BYU family camp up the mountain. We play all sorts of music so that is why it irked me that he changed the song. I mean right after we listened to "TGIF" which cusses and that is the ONE rule we have on songs, no cussing. Double standards just annoy me. It's like with movies.
      Straight couples can sex and it will still be PG-13
      Gay couples may kiss and it's R
      That makes no sense in my mind.

      And P.S. sorry for not actually editing my post before I submitted. I was in a hurry last night.

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    2. I like this post. And you. And you're right, we are SO much more than an orientation, and we change the world one person at a time, simply by being ourselves.

      Thanks, Dupree.

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  2. On the post you took down, did I comment? I swear I did... Anyway, I love this and I love your frank openess. You have a strength and courage that I envy and hope to emulate someday soon! Much love to you!

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    1. Idk. Maybe. What did you say?
      I'm not all that courageous. I can't even tell half the people here. But it's not because I don't want to, it's because I don't know how to bring that up. I mean seriously I wear a rainbow bracelet and have a decorated my name tag with rainbows... seems obvious to me :P

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  3. What a wonderful post! I love it. I will come to your restaurant. And leave big tips (assuming you'll have good servers :).

    It's amazing to me still that people are weird about things. Sometimes when Jo and I are out and about and holding hands I forget that it might be possible people are giving us weird looks because we're holding hands rather than all the nasty tattoos and piercings...wait. It's so normal for me to be me and to love my Jo that I forget it's even an issue to some people that we are together.


    I love what you're doing, Dupree. It makes a huge difference even for one person to know some of the things about you--to know that you're gay for instance--because that's where we learn empathy. It's all about letting people see the intimate parts of our lives. The truth under all social "how are you, I'm good"s.


    You're amazing. That's what I'm saying.

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  4. I've never paid attention to the words to that song. I like it. It's good.
    Free your mind. :)

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  5. I also just want you to know that you have commandeered my entire evening by distracting me with Ellen Degeneres. I have now spent like two hours watching clips from her show and just so you know she and Portia are absolutely ADORABLE. the end.

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    1. That is hilarious. I only know the Glee version and I just like the whole message of not judging you know? And yes Ellen is adorable. Almost makes me wish I could watch day time TV just to see her.
      And thanks for saying I'm amazing. I'm doing what I can even if it right now it's not enough. Someday though BYU will be more gay friendly and I can be a part of that.

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