Wednesday, August 22, 2012

Lame Puppy Picture

Hmmm. What should I write about? Oh! I have an idea! How about last night when the roommate I have grown to love plays the douche and his twin sister who I use to date arrives while my boyfriend is in the room. Not to mention of course the realization that I still had strong feelings for her. That was fun.

In fact, it may be safe to say that I have stronger feelings for Miranda (the pseudonym for my roommate's twin) then I do for Jay. It might not be too surprising considering that I built a stronger relationship over a longer period of time with her, but I haven't seen her in two years. Or, at least haven't seen her for more than a couple hours for the last two years.

Anyways, Tuesday night wasn't fun. I was heavily flirting with Miranda for several hours with Jay present. P.S. Miranda knows what's going on. She knows I'm gay. She knows I like(d) her even if she doesn't know the full extent (she might). She probably guessed who Jay was. Yet I shamelessly flirted with her. And strongly wanted to cuddle. Even if I've wanted to cuddle with everything I see including tree stumps and the raccoon that we found chillin' in the garbage today. But still.

I'm frustrated with my roommate. I've built a great relationship with Matt over the past couple years. But now he has a girlfriend and doesn't yet know how to act as an individual and not a unit. Translation: he is not hanging out with me. Given, he says him and his girlfriend built an amazing relationship within the past year, but I thought he was better than the people who exchange everyone in their lives for a relationship. Oh well.

To end with a disclaimer, I really like Jay. I've only known him for four months, but I do like him. I just haven't had time to build the relationship like I did with Miranda (or Brian for THAT matter). In fact, I've realized recently how much I do like him. I think he's great. And cute. Though don't tell him I said that.

Even if he does read these posts.


  1. that is such a sad, yet still cute picture.

    also, I am one of those people who exchanged everyone in their lives for a relationship...I don't think I care because we have the cutest, funnest relationship ever.

  2. Good luck, you are still young and relationships will come and go and change as you change. It's all part of life - especially as you transition worlds (mormon to non-mormon, etc.). Good luck with it all and I hope you know we are all rooting for you!