I seem to be the stereotype Mormon boy. Then you start talking to me. And you wonder... there's sarcasm, yeah, but a lot of Mormon boys have that. Then I start saying stuff that causally mentions condoms in my backpack. And people begin to wonder. Is he serious? I am. But of course I roll it off like it's a joke. So, they think it was for the shock effect. It was. But they also don't think I was serious. Then I play music like "Touch-a Touch-a Me." Then they really think I'm crazy. Espesially when the next song is "One of Us." (What If God Was One Of Us.)
The point is, I know myself in the Mormon world. I'm a seemingly good Mormon boy who keeps himself aloof because I treat myself as a silent outcast. I also say things sometimes as jokes, the shock effect kind. I've lived in the Mormon world for the past two years. Before that, in Southern Californian high school, most of my friends weren't Mormon but treated me as such. So, I know myself in the Mormon world quite well.
Then, last night, I found myself in a non-Mormon crowd, and this wasn't my world. Sure, I was slightly uncomfortable (like most people would be in new situations), but I found myself in a new world, the world I want to embrace. People who are not Mormon, good people and, frankly, real. This is the world I want to be in. And I don't know myself in this world.
Excited as Hell to get to rediscover myself in this non-Mormon world.